Living with the Elderly

"Getting old isn't for pussies." My dad said, remarking about his parents who now live with us.

To me, my grandparents were always old; when I was born my grandfather was already 76 years-old. Now he's 98. I've seen him lose his sight, his hearing, and his ability to move around easy. I've seen how daunting it can be just to get up on the sidewalk in front of a convenient store and even how hard it is to put pants on in the morning.

On the other side of the coin, my cousin just had a baby. I now know that living to be in the 90s (some even younger) face the cyclical nature of life, that you will become a baby again in your old age. You'll need endless patience to care for them, and maybe even more patience to be that old. The difference between being a baby and being old is that you've had a life that you were always dependant on yourself and to watch that wither away, not being able to do anything about it, is extremely difficult.

Everyday we complain about things in our life: that we have bills over due, that we hate that jackass that cut us off, that we keep getting called into work: but the truth is that without those things, we wouldn't have much to live for. Life is made of complications, and when you get old they are abundant, but none of them are yours alone. The children that you raised are going to be the ones helping you then. Privacy is a thing of the past. In the end, we may lose our dignity, just to live another few years. Living with with the elderly has taught me one thing, humility, because in the end you're going to go out with nothing but the love of the people that you raised, the generation that followed you. All the friends that my grandfather had made in his life are gone now. He has lived through two world wars, people landing on the moon, the invention of the TV, radio, Internet, computer.... He still has his memories and the love of his family, but for a lot of people they have neither.

My grandfather has lived a long and caring life. He never hesistated to help those in need around him. Which proves to me that those that constantly destroy the relationships around them, that try not to mend ties between broken family members or friends, are going to find themselves desperately alone in the end. That should be enough to scare anyone, I know it scares me.

It is hard to watch the people that you love, the people that took you fishing, the people that taught you how drive, the people that taught you a lot about life, get old. Part of it is a selfish thing, that you know you will be in those same shoes one day. Mostly though, its watching someone whose life seemed so bright to you, start to dim, knowing that you can't do anything about it but make them as comfortable as possible.

The relationship between my grandparents uplifts me . They are a team, constantly looking out for each other. My grandmother has a tumor in her leg and for a long time my grandfather looked after her, now she looks after him as best she can. Without that tie, I know that both of them would have a much harder time. The divorce rate in this country is very high, but if people knew that in the end your going to want someone that you've known for a long time by your side, a lot of them might think differently... Because without each other, we have nothing.